The Night You Disappeared
The screen door
slammed shut
a rifle crack of sound
that split the air…creating
a silence so profound
it was as if the earth
and all she carries
upon her face
had together of
one accord…
stopped breathing
And then the crickets
begin again and a
man on the front and one
on the rear carries you
across the porch
their breath coming hard
as they lift you up
over the step
and you’re so beautiful
eyes closed peacefully
hair a shining black halo
framing your silent face
stark against the white
of stretcher sheets
I sit up high in my
crow’s nest of a
strange man’s arms
peering over his shoulder
heady with the scent
of his aftershave
Old Spice, I think…
not really knowing
what the tableau
before me means
as you disappeared
into the gaping maw
of a white, red bubble
topped vehicle that
flashed and screamed you
away from me / from us
into the void of night
I didn’t know then
the hurt that you carried
so deep that it was ground
into the DNA of your
bones, your blood and
your brain…all tiny
silvery razorblades of
pain that cut away your
smile a little more
bit by bit until your teeth
no longer saw the
light of day
I didn’t understand an agony
that could make you
want to disappear…forever
For a long time about
that night I didn’t remember
the ceremony of your
preparations to leave us
how you bathed us and
dressed us all up
in our Sunday best
my two brothers and I
how you sat us upon
the sofa all in a row
so shiny and perfect
while you took yourself
in your finest raiment
behind the bathroom door
where with the click of a
lock
you embarked upon
your journey…no luggage
needed as you swallowed
your one way ticket
You came back one day
but not really…the absence
it was there…in your eyes
for a very long time
I missed you so much
R.M. Romo June 2013 ©