Seamless

I've ripped 
them all 
these seams
that long held
the "what is"
stitch by stitch
tugging at safe
til it's off the rails
with the whole 
of my might
tearing it 
wide open
this place of 
"what if" 
flinging my 
dreams 
come true 
to hang 
amongst 
the stars with 
a thumb out
hitching a ride
on the tail of
a comet's
fiery blaze 
an indelible 
promise of 
my heart's 
desire...
Yet to come



October 4, 2014

PEACE

Paramedics rolled up

lights flashing

sirens wailing and

in a blur of motion

they hit the ground

running hard

shouting for help

cause Peace is dying

drawing her last breath

I stood in the hall

watching in shock

as they rolled her

past me

she looked

done in

the blood was

everywhere

it took my breath

to see her injured so

such gaping wounds

how could she live

would she live

I followed them

to her cubicle

where

in a frenzy the

doctors worked

to save her life

seemed like days

passed us by as

we stood vigil

in waiting

to see if she,

we, the world, was

doomed

And then at long last

there was quite

as the docs

stepped back and

said,” We’ve done

all there is to do”

we can only pray

that she’ll come

through and rejoin

the living

I sat by her bed

all through the

night, casting

prayers to the

heavens, asking

for a little longer

to keep her with

us all, to cover us

with her smile and

embrace us in the

warmth of her heart

She caught me at my

praying, looking hard

at me through her

swollen eyes and

mumbled something

that was hard to hear

I leaned in closer to

listen to what she had

to say and this is

what I heard

Go head on and

pray if you must

but I gotta tell you its

praying that is at the heart

of my hurt,

the knife in my back

the bomb at your door

the silent killer

Don’t you see

everyone thinking

that their God is

the best, the brightest

the rightest and

they act on it

everyday in ways

that drive me to

my knees, reeling

from the assault

of a world gone mad

all In the name

of God

all through time

carrying on

saying and doing

“My God is bigger

than your God”

shields emblazoned with red crosses

death to the infidels

“May God bless us

Everyone”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

burning non-believing

heathens

at the stake for

their heresy

tearing down the temples

“Glory to God”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

line up for the

showers all you

Jews, Gypsies and Queers as we

clean up a nation

“Sieg Heil my God”

“My God is Bigger

than your God”

and His book says

that I may own you

all aboard in

iron bracelets

headed for the

land of cotton

“Praise Gawd”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

and to prove it

I’m gonna blow

up your people

bulldoze their homes

leaving nothing but

bloody rubble

“Shalom”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

so I’m gonna strap

on explosives and

march right into

that crowded cafe

Boom! Boom! and

“Allah is Great”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

and that lets me

shoot up your

Protestant school

its okay if children

die to prove

God’s might

“Hail Mary full

of Grace”

“My God is bigger

than your God”

and with my good

right arm I’ll

launch a fiery

cocktail through

your Papist

mother’s window

she’s dancing now

burn baby burn

“Amen and Amen”

Gasping for breath

Peace fell back on

her pillows, tears

coursing down

her face, her monitors

sounding the alarm

Now barely a whisper

she told of

Sikhs and Hindus

Christians and Muslims

Buddists and Hindus Orthodox Christians

and Muslims

Catholics and Protestants

Hindus and Muslims

the combinations

pouring like a river

from her mouth

filling the room

with wave after wave

of all the violence

done to Peace and

her people

in the name of God

Peace grabbed

my hand and whispered

in a voice ragged

with the grief

of the world

pray if you must

pray for us all

but do it quietly

for the sound of

praying is breaking

my heart....

 Randi M. Romo © 2002

Half Past Love

This watch

tells time

decorates

my wrist

weighty

in its gold

and silver

presence

but it’s neither

jewelry nor

timekeeper

it’s forgiveness

the first taste

of understanding

its an exhale

a moment

when I knew

that my mother

truly saw me

when shopping

one day she

took me - her

only daughter

to the counter

where men

shop for watches

and helped me

pick out this

watch that tells

time very well

both hands

pointing

right at

love thirty...

Truthful Tuesday at the Arkansas Capitol - LGBTQ Equality

On May 9, 2014 we saw what no one had thought possible in Arkansas for many years yet to come….the tangible first steps of marriage equality. In the time between the initial ruling and the AR Supreme Court’s issued stay while the case is pending an appeal, over 500 AR couples obtained legal marriage licenses. Many couples not only were able to legally celebrate their love for one another, they were also able to amend their children’s birth certificates allowing both parents to be legally recognized as such. It was a heady and wonderful time to see this series of events occurring that quite honestly, I could have never guessed at or hoped for as a young dyke coming out in the early 1970’s.

This case is important beyond the scope of couples wishing to marry. This case is now a historical account of how we Arkansans just like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz have always had the power!

Many scoffed at Cheryl Maples when she filed this case almost on the heels of the Windsor case in the United States Supreme Court that struck down Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act. I personally felt that Arkansas was much further behind than the other states in regard to marriage equality. I was wrong.

Cheryl Maples with her co-counsel Jack Wagoner had no support financially or otherwise from any outside national organizations, they all too believed that Cheryl and company were tilting at windmills. They were wrong too!

And this is our lesson as Arkansans - that together we can make the changes for the equality that we need, the equality that by virtue of our birthright and our country’s constitution would seem to demand. We are required to pay taxes to a state and country that does not embrace, respect or include us in the access to equal rights and protections the same way as our fellow Arkansans and Americans are treated.  This. Is. Wrong. Before we are Arkansans, we are human beings, before we are our racial or ethnic group identities, we are human beings, before we are men or women or agendered we are human beings, before we are Americans we are human beings.

A lot has been made of the term choice by those who oppose our equality, claiming that we chose to be LGBTQ people. The reality is that the vast majority of the LGBTQ community do not choose their sexual orientation or gender identity, it is simply who we are, as inherent as our other biological traits, like the color of our eyes. What is true however, is that the people who hurt LGBTQ people with discriminatory laws and policies and those who go even further and physically attack, maim and even murder us do in fact CHOOSE this behavior. No one is born to hate, no one is born being homophobic or transphobic. Yet, from the pulpit and the legislature we continue to be attacked, keeping our communities on the defenseive trying to stop or undo these attacks. And while we may yet find ourselves forced to play a little more defense, it is time to take a stand and go on offense! To stand up and fight together for our rights!

Marriage equality is a wonderful thing for the couples who desire this right. But there are a lot of LGBTQ Arkansans for whom marriage is not an option; not old enough, haven’t met the right one, don’t care to marry, etc. Additionally for those who do marry, your marriage license does not protect you and your family in regard to employment, housing or access to public accommodations. LGBTQ Arkansans are not included in the state or national civil rights laws. Our LGBTQ youth in AR are still experiencing bullying in their schools and too many times it is school personnel who are doing the bullying.

We must also remember that if you are LGBTQ and your identity intersects with poverty, being a person of color, youth, immigrant, transgender, living with HIV, etc. then your struggle as an LGBTQ person is further compounded with the systemic difficulties that are associated with these identities.

The time is right now for LGBTQ people and our allies to continue this momentum and to address these inequalities. We. Ourselves. LGBTQ Arkansans and our amazing allies! We must create the change we so desperately need to obtain full equality under the law.

At CAR we have been working for some time with allies to build the relationships and the foundation to be a part of moving forward for this very equality. As a founding member of the Arkansans for Human and Civil Rights we have four priorities:

• Non-partisan electoral work
• Expanding the impact and efficacy of the Racial Profiling Task Force
• “Add the Words” campaign to amend the Arkansas Civil Rights law to include sexual   orientation and gender identity
• Creating a Civil Rights Commission entity for Arkansas - We are one of only three states that do not have one

The “Add the Words” campaign along with the creation of a civil rights commission not only has the potential to provide the LGBTQ community with equal rights and protections, but our efforts will support the many Arkansans who are currently included in the state’s civil rights law little means to address the civil rights violations that they encounter.

So I say to you gathered here today and all across this beautiful state that I have come to call home, the state that I love so much, where I live and raised a child. It is because of this love that I ask of you all to remember, burn this into your hearts….It is time! It is time! It is time! To….Stand up! Stand up! Stand up! Our rights will not magically appear, we must stand up and refuse to take no for an answer.

It’s coming, the South is moving. We witnessed a tremendous piece of history that was made here on May 9^th, Arkansas! The first Southern state to have a legal same sex marriage, quite a few of them in fact!

But! We are not done, we have seen what is possible and we now know that NOTHING is impossible! To the state of Arkansas and its good people, remember, we are your family, your friends, your neighbors, your co-workers and more. We too! Are Arkansas! And we are coming for our rights! Full equality! Nothing less!

Hell Froze Over in Arkansas - Again

Recently Arkansas saw a whirlwind of same sex couples rushing to courthouses around the state in an effort to enter into the bonds of matrimony with their significant other. Afraid that the courts will stay the issuance of marriage licenses, couples have had to hurry their weddings with little or no time to bring together their family and friends.

Dee Dee Coleman and Freeman Toniah - Just Married

I personally know many of these couples. My heart is filled with joy at their happiness at being able to engage in what is an American, nay, a worldwide cultural tradition. One that has been taught to us our entire childhood - that you will meet that special someone, fall in love and one day marry them. But then we grew up and discovered that if the special someone we met and fell in love with was of the same gender then it didn't really mean us.

When we came to understand this it was a painful discovery on multiple fronts. Not only could we not engage in the marriage ceremonies that were reminiscent of those we had grown up seeing all of our lives, we would also be denied all of the legal rights associated with marriage. It meant that the 1,138 civil laws that are attached to marriage are not for us, it meant that we couldn't be listed as joint parents when we have children as a couple - causing multiple parenting difficulties, it meant that we couldn't access the benefits of marriage that are provided for many employees and their spouses, it meant that we needed complicated and expensive legal documents to protect our property and family in the event one of us fell ill, or worse yet died, and it meant that despite paying the same tax dollars - we would be denied full civil and human rights.

Being denied the rights of marriage reinforces all of the rhetoric of homophobia that has made too many of our fellow Arkansans believe that it is okay to harm us with law, words and deed.  Throughout our lives we are bullied in school and even into our adult years. It is more than likely that a great many of us will suffer some form of physical harm to ourselves and/or our property. Some of us will be disowned, kicked out of our homes and far too many of us will not make it through.

The inequities that LGBTQ people face in Arkansas as well as many other parts of the country don’t stop with marriage. We are vulnerable regarding employment, housing and accessing public accommodations because we are not included in the civil rights laws of this nation, nor this state. If we are any combination of people of color, poor, transgender, immigrant, youth, or elders then our disenfranchisement as LGBTQ people is compounded by institutional oppression that squeeze our lives even harder.

The mistreatment of the LGBTQ community has been deeply rooted in political gain by those who have cloaked their avarice in scripture and holy water. They have continued to render us as an “other” - to be feared and denied equality. The reality is that the only real fear is that which LGBTQ people endure. Fear is an integral part of our lives, sometimes front and center, other times lurking in the background because you never know when someone will target you with word, law or deed. Yet despite these many struggles and barriers, we live our lives with courage and hope, for it takes fortitude to live in a world that denies you at every turn. We continue to fall in love, create our families and live and work in our communities.

As I watch the events unfolding around marriage equality my heart feels as if it will burst from all of the happiness. Couples, some with their children, laughing and smiling, saying “I do.” Tears pouring freely because at last they are able to wed, gaining all of the emotional and practical well-being that this brings to their family.

The courts will have another go before it’s all finalized in regard to marriage equality. To be sure there will sadly be those who will continue to vilify us and actively seek to deny our access to equality, using our lives and families as political footballs.

However, I am hopeful that as Arkansas bends, however grudgingly, toward the end of the moral arc of justice that our equality is within reach. It is long past the time for Arkansas to embrace all of its residents and remove the multiple barriers to full inclusion. And we as a state will ultimately be the better for it. Because we in the LGBTQ community are as we have ever been - your family, friends, co-workers and neighbors. We too are Arkansas.

When the Music Plays

When I hear

Santana

I know what

the music

smells like

as it dances

across

sweet brown skin

slipping and

flowing into

that warm

drowning place

where the valley

begins

and the moon

shines

bright

enough

to light

up the sun

The Expected of Unexpected Flights

Among a snowbank

of hospital blankets

she lay as still

and as small as

I’d ever seen

this giant of a woman

who would forever be

my greatest love

my worst adversary

my ultimate teacher

my most wounded heart

my everything…

my mother

Her heart it seems

tried to dubstep

not so good it appears

if you’re all of 77

so there she lay

sleeping off the happy

shot of the heart cath

while I tried to slow

the galloping terrors

that my own heart

insisted upon riding

from the moment the

call came to me as

I sat at my desk over

900 miles away from

the scene of her heart’s

misadventure that

had detoured

her planned excursion

to Sonny’s bar-b-q

her favorite place

for ribs

I stroked her hair that

was no longer the shade

of black that had often

seemed to be blue

in some winks of light

now with the years

becoming a crown

of elder's grey

I wanted to climb into

the very bed with her

to calm my roiling fears

to reassure us both

that it would be alright

instead I stood with her

hand wrapped in mine

She awoke at my touch

and admonished me

for having come so far

insisting that she was

more than fine that it

had only been a hiccup

but I knew I saw it in her

eyes what it meant that

I was there that I wanted

to be right there

We've a complicated

story - she and I

one of gargantuan

mistakes and almost

irreconcilable offenses

filled with unimaginable

pain and longing that

that in times past I’d

never dared to hope that

we’d recover from it all

yet somehow…we did

albeit in our twilight

My mom and I are

a testimony to the power

of the heart and its

ability to heal against

insurmountable odds

I reminded myself of this

as I leaned in and

kissed her cheek

and I told her

“Hey pretty gurl

don’t you worry

we got this”

                                                                                                                     Randi M. Romo (c) 2/2014